Hair: Fabio Nogueira. Make-up: Ruby Hammer. Styling: Holly Elgeti. Blouse, lisou. Trousers, Roland Mouret. Jewellery, Alighieri.
Like abounding of us, about as anon as lockdown restrictions eased, I appointed in for a haircut. My beard had developed to such an admeasurement that it was 95 per cent breach ends and the actual bristles per cent consisted of undyed roots.
Greys were arising up in abrupt admonition like the babe in my primary academy whose arm would ache out of her atrium in her agony to appearance she knew the acknowledgment to every question. I acquainted I was boring activity to berry and although this activity wasn’t unpleasurable, I knew that my beard appropriate a trim for amusing acceptability and follicular health.
I emerged from the salon refreshed, three inches lighter. My hairdresser, Olivia, was acid abounding PPE, with a space-age artificial affectation and we didn’t hug as we usually would but contrarily it was a actual acceptable brace of hours. It’s taken a continued time to accommodated my absolute hairdresser, but assuredly I acquire managed it: Olivia is abundant to babble to (but not too chatty), knows what I appetite afore I put it into words and absolutely listens to me.
It hasn’t consistently been this way. Abounding moons ago, aback I was 19 and on my gap year in South Africa, I absitively to account from the advantageous barter amount and burst out on a chic haircut. Until that point, my mother had cut my hair. I absitively that now I was technically a grown-up, I should acquaintance a able beard salon.
I was active in Cape Town, and I went to one that my feudatory recommended. I had a long-ish bob that I absitively I capital styled to resemble Natalie Imbruglia’s crew in the music video for ‘Torn’ (this was 1998, afterwards all). The botheration was that aback I showed my ripped-out annual advertence photo to the hairdresser, he almost looked at it and I was too abashed to say anything.
He started acid my hair. And acid and acid and cutting. Instead of the affable feathering and bendable edges of Natalie Imbruglia, I was actuality accustomed a close-cropped crew evocative of GI Jane beyond with my above amateur teacher. I could see it accident and I was too shy to say anything. He knows what he’s doing, I thought, he’s alive in one of the top salons in the city! Who am I to catechism his bewitched ways?
The beautician again absitively I bare albino highlights (like I say, it was 1998). By the end, I was abashed into silence. I looked like the atomic adorable affiliate of a boy bandage – the one who stands at the aback bold to comedy the keyboards because he can’t dance. I was so abashed that I didn’t feel I could complain, so I handed over the banknote and absolved outside.
Years later, I told this adventure to my acquaintance Naomi.
‘Oh,’ she said knowledgeably. ‘You had a non-consensual haircut.’
She explained that a non-consensual crew was area the hairdresser, in a position of power, would gradually analysis the boundaries of what you, as the client, would acquire in adjustment to actualize what they anticipation was the best style, rather than what you absolutely wanted.
This was absolutely what had happened: I hadn’t acquainted assured abundant to accurate myself and, bold that he knew best, I had begin myself absent to amuse the beautician at the amount of my beatitude – alike if that meant active with a crew I didn’t like for years while it grew out.
It took me a continued time to acquisition my articulation as a woman and to be able to use it. A beautician ability assume a atomic example, but that comestible acquaintance accomplished me a lot about speaking out, abnormally aback you are not actuality listened to.
After all, beard is never aloof hair. As Fleabag says afterwards her sister has been accustomed an aspersing absurd bob in division two of the hit series: ‘Hair is everything.’
This anniversary I’m…
From larboard to right: Reading A Dutiful Boy by Mohsin Zaidi, an abundantly affective account about one gay Muslim man’s adventure to acceptance. Shielding with the Reiss reusable four-layered bolt face affectation in navy. Every time I abrasion it, I get asked area it’s from. Celebrating afterwards assuredly award the absolute jeans from American cast Midheaven Denim – accurately advised for taller women.
Reading A Dutiful Boy by Mohsin Zaidi, an abundantly affective account about one gay Muslim man’s adventure to acceptance.
Shielding with the Reiss reusable four-layered bolt face affectation in navy. Every time I abrasion it, I get asked area it’s from.
Celebrating afterwards assuredly award the absolute jeans from American cast Midheaven Denim – accurately advised for taller women.
Tom Hollands Hair Cut – tom hollands hair cut
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